The heART of Ritual

musings

On Grief



It's okay to be sad, to feel a bit shaky and uncertain, melancholic, to lament, and to grieve. Despite a collective disembodiment to the blue shades of the spectrum, these states are not evidence that something is wrong with you, that you have failed, that you need to meditate more or pray harder. Or that you need to become better at staying in the present moment, manifest the opposite of sadness, or transcend it by way of some process.


It is high-voltage evidence that you are alive, with a tender beating heart, subtle and perceptive mirror neurons, and senses that are open to the full-spectrum, chaotic glory of being a human being who is alive at this time.


Just in this one moment, be sad. Fully. Not partially. Go inside the sadness. Find the sad one there. Speak with her, listen to him, feel what she is feeling, see what he is seeing. Turn your body into a vessel, a temple where the lost orphans of psyche and soma can come to share their art, and rest.


Get close to the sad one, but not so close that you become flooded. Intimacy without fusion. Relationship without merging, honoring your own integrity, interiority, and perspective. Offer sanctuary and safe passage for the shattered pieces to unfold, illuminate, and reorganize.


Sadness and melancholy are not things you need to fix, cure, or transcend. They are arising at this moment not to be healed, but to be held. You need not shift sadness into some 'higher' state or apply teachings so that it will yield into something else. For it is complete and pure on its own, as a unique messenger of the personal, cultural, and archetypal soul.


With the fire of awareness and the ally of your breath, descend into your belly, travel inside your heart, open a portal into your throat, your imagination, and the life force which is reverberating within you. Tend to the raw, shaky life that is longing to be held. And listen.


It is by way of this journey that sadness will be revealed to be what it is, a secret wisdom-guide and bridge into the universal heart, a messenger of power, mercy, and fierce compassion that wants you as its midwife. ~ words by Matt Licata.


Only through surrender, release, and grieving, can we truly cultivate our inner landscapes and roots. Only with deep listening, quiet observation, and authenticity, can we embody the wisdom of the Earth Element and the gifts of Winter.